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Asking and Answering to High School Dances

Help Me! It’s Time For The Dance, Now What Do I Do?

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Part 3

Think about your clothing

  • Girls remember to choose shoes wisely and have your dress hemmed accordingly; you don’t want to trip over it all night.  
  • You are going to be in those shoes aallooonnnggg time that day and or night.  Keep that in mind when you pick them out.  Shoes like these below are cute, but not easy to dance, or walk in very long! If you do get blisters, use a piece of moleskin on the sore.  You can see it HERE
    Dating asking and answering

    Dating asking and answering

  • Girls, use body tape to keep blouses or tops in place and not revealing.  Also great for a quick hem fix. This tape is amazing and a must. Find it HERE

Modesty, however, is extremely attractive! 

  • PLEASE find a dress (or modify it) so it is modest. Little dresses are not enough to cover the subject in my humble opinion…

It is awkward and embarrassing for a young man when he expects his date will dress appropriately; yet finds otherwise when picking her up.  Seriously consider that you are advertising by how you dress.  I have 3 sons and 2 daughters. And from many years of experience and watching all the young men and women come through my life as friends of my kids, the girls appreciate when the other girls in the group are dressed modestly because of the atmosphere it creates.  The guys appreciate it, and can easily see how much self-confidence a girl has, when she doesn’t feel that she has to ‘advertise’ her body, as all that she has to offer – is skimpy clothing.  This leads to respect and friendship; the basis of all great relationships.

EXTRA GOOD INFO

Dating asking and answering

Dating asking and answering

  • To the young men being asked to a girls preference: When you are asked to a dance, if you feel it appropriate, give a her or small box of candy when she picks you up as a small thank you.
  • To the young ladies being asked to a guys preference: When you are asked to a dance, if you feel it appropriate, give a small box of candy to your date when he picks you up as a small thank you.

Such as:  HERE is one idea, and HERE is another, and HERE, and so many more if you type in ‘thank you’.

WHY?
It shows appreciation to that person that they would go to the expense and effort to take you to the dance. This goes a long way in showing gratitude, which comes out more naturally in other aspects of your life as you practice it here.

BIG DONT’s!

  • Do NOT be forward! Meaning, do not try to hold hands or hug, etc, etc, etc, if the other is not interested.
  • Do not dance suggestively!  Doing so, only ‘advertises’ that person has little to offer, and make the others in the group/date uncomfortable.
  • Profanity, crude jokes, and language are overheard by many.  My daughters would turn down dates with guys after hearing them talk in such a manner. Likewise, my sons would also not ask girls out after they overheard them talking ‘like a sailor’.   It is not impressive but degrading.

You Do NOT want to be remembered by your date, or others in the group like this-

Dating asking and answering

Dating asking and answering

BIG DO’s!

  • Let your date, their parents and yours, know the plans for the activities, times of events, cell numbers (at least yours if not others in the group) and locations for the night’s events. Providing an itinerary is very appreciated by parents and your date beforehand so they know how to prepare.  Such as how to dress for (it’s is not fun for a girl who is wearing heels to find out they are going on a long hike after leaving her house for the date – yikes!), what time to expect the date to start and end; all those details.  Besides being just plain considerate, it provides safety.

Girls, here’s a VERY useful tip:

  • I created a post that gives very simple step-by-step instructions on how to make a temporary pocket on your slip.  This will go under your dress to hold a cell phone, some money, your lipstick, maybe a credit card, your car key if you drove and a few needed items.  Ladies, you never, EVER want to be left in a compromising situation, and not having control of your phone, your car key if you drove, money, puts you in a possible dangerous situation if you do not know your date well….or even if you do! Gals I know you don’t want to carry a purse and will often times give your things to your date, which is not a good idea.  So this will allow you to carry them effortlessly, not matter the length of your dress, since it goes on your slip, to keep you safe.  Check it out HERE

Finally: You will want to remembered as a good person and someone others want to be around.  If you live by the Golden Rule:   Do Unto Others as you would have Them Do Unto You, then you will build a great reputation and wonderful friendships.  So enjoy this time of your life by being smart, staying safe and make good choices. 

I have awesome printables for ASKING AND ANSWERING TO DANCES and a Dating CHEAT SHEET to make dances AWESOME!

Copyright Carrie Groneman, A Mother’s Shadow, 2013, 2018

Recognize a blessing and be a blessing today.

Pictures courtesy of Pixabay

More Teen Interests:

Part 1: How To Make Going To A High School Dance Painless

 

 

 

Part 2:  It’s Time For The Dance And Anxiety Has Arrived!

 

 

 

TEEN GROUP DATE & PARTY IDEAS
DATING CONVERSATION STARTER’S & WOW IDEAS
ARE WE ON A DATE?
TO DATE OR HANG OUT?
STORY ABOUT CHOOSE GOOD FRIENDS VS  ‘friends’ 

Asking and Answering to High School Dances

It's Time For The Dance And Anxiety Has Arrived!

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Asking and Answering to High School Dances

Help with knowing what to do for a High School Dance


 

Part 2 

PREPARATION IS EVERY THING

Dating asking and answering

Dating asking and answering


How do we make this dance as perfect as possible?  Just like everything else that’s GREAT, you think ahead and PLAN!

  • Let’s prepare for the date.
  • Sit down and write it all out.
  • Make an itinerary of what you are doing, where you are going and give that to your date so she/he knows how to dress, what time things are happening and they can prepare for hair appointments, school projects, family activities and other events in their life. It’s a winner idea and so polite!
  • There are a few things you can control, meaning the details are huge; small and large.
  • If you are in charge or are the one asking, make sure to know:

WHERE you are going to eat
WHAT you are doing for the event

  • Such as, are you doing a day activity, group activity, games or anything like that as part of this dance?  I have ideas for you HERE to help you out

Once you’ve done all of that to your best, RELAX and have FUN!  
Above all, remember, you can’t control the what the others are doing, little hiccups that will crop up, and things out of your control, so just go-with-the-flow and ENJOY! It will work out if you’ve done your part and are a good sport and easy going  😉 
HOW do you act and behave on a date




 
Let’s start with HOW TO ACT WITH YOUR DATE so you don’t come across as obnoxious, not nice or worse.

Dating asking and answering

Dating asking and answering

  • Do NOT switch dates at the dance/date! You have been asked by a person who is paying for your ticket, your dinner, so be polite to them.  Pay attention to your date all night. It’s only right, kind and shows good manners. 
  • Young ladies don’t split up, segregating into a girls section. You are on a date, NOT a girls- night- out at the expense of someone else.
  • Be appropriate in your behavior and kind to everyone in the group – that is EVERYONE!
  • Girls talk to your parents about the ‘door-step’ scene and how to best handle the situation; and what they expectation. Girls, do NOT have this conversation with other girls in front of your date or especially the guys in the group, it’s awkward for them.  A handshake, hug (not body mashing), or just a thank you is what you should be discussing BEFORE the date.  

* If you don’t have someone to talk to you about this, I’ll give you my advice here. Some girls have the impression that if a guy spends money on them, they ‘owe’ them something.  The ONLY thing you OWE them is to be polite, courteous and a gracious person on the date!  If you are comfortable giving a hug at the doorstep, then fine, but you should NEVER feel obligated to do more than that, nor ever anything you are uncomfortable with.  E.V.E.R.!  Email me and we will chat.

  • Teach your son, or daughter, that even if they go to the dance (or on a date) with someone they are not as interested in,  it is so important to STILL be gracious and POLITE. That person is spending money, time and energy on your teen. The date should have an attitude of respect towards your son or daughter, of being NICE and not a jerk for the rest of their life.  Other people will be watching also, to know if they want to risk the same treatment.
  • In a dance group one of my kids happened to be in, a young lady asked a young man who was extremely popular and I wondered how this would work out.  She was cute, but not ‘drop-dead-gorgeous’ as other girls I knew this young man went out with and I think it was her first dance.  Being involved all day with the group, from the day activity, to the dinner, and afterward for dessert, I witnessed first-hand the situation.   I have the highest admiration for that young man!  You would have thought he was out with a super model with the way he paid attention to her, and was genuinely nice the entire time.  They never went out again, but for that night, she was the bell of the ball and treated as such.

 
WHAT DO I DO AT DINNER? – the restaurant or wherever you eat

Dating asking and answering

Dating asking and answering

  1. When going to a restaurant, make sure to order an average priced menu item, or the samefood your date does. Do not be rude and try to bust his/her budget.
  2. Do not eat with your mouth open.
  3. Do not talk with your mouth full of food, or even partially full of food—please!
  4. Men open doors, pull out chairs, etc..  It’s charming and gentlemanly.  Ladies allow them do it.  It is NOT a sign of weakness to have manners!
  5. While in the subject of table manners, please, please, please do not chew gum.  Very few, if any, are capable of chewing gum without popping, snapping, chomping and looking a wee bit ‘cowish’.  It’s annoying and not flattering.  Breath mints, however, ARE flattering.
  6. Brush up on which fork to use and when; along with the other utensils and pieces at the table.





WHAT DO I TALK ABOUT?

  • Do you worry about being boring?
  • Worry about dead silence for minutes or an hour at a time?
  • For sure, do not talk about other guys or girls on your date. That’s major jerkiness!
  • Girls, please be kind when speaking about other girls in the group, or otherwise.  This really sets the tone for the entire event.
  • Be interested in THEM! Ask about their hobbies, their job, what they are doing – don’t’ talk about yourself all night.  Give yourself the 3-1 rule.  You get to talk about yourself one time to three of theirs. About one subject or topic to three of theirs.  It makes for a wonderful evening, you just might make a great friend, and learn something too.

To go with these tips, I have a post to help you out HERE all about conversation starters and tips for not sounding……well…..boring or just empty-headed, but someone who is incredibly interesting and fun.

Dating asking and answering

Dating asking and answering


 
Come on over and visit Part 3 the final post in the Series and I’ll give you some ideas on how to dress for the event, along with big do’s and don’ts 
Remember to download those helpful Asking & Answering Printables 
And the Dating Cheat-sheet at the store for free!
 

Copyright Carrie Groneman, A Mother’s Shadow, 2013, 2018

Recognize a blessing and be a blessing today.

Pictures courtesy of Pixabay

More Teen Interests:

Part 1: How To Make Going To A High School Dance Painless

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Part 3:  Help Me! It’s Time For The Dance, Now What Do I Do?

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
TEEN GROUP DATE & PARTY IDEAS
DATING CONVERSATION STARTER’S & WOW IDEAS
ARE WE ON A DATE?
TO DATE OR HANG OUT?
STORY ABOUT CHOOSE GOOD FRIENDS VS  ‘friends’ 
HELP IS HERE TO ORGANIZE YOUR ROOM!