Which Direction Are You Choosing To Go In Life?

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Which Way 1

Which Way?

Many years ago when I first began driving, I moved to live with my dad about 130 miles from my mom.  Mom and dad had divorced when I was 9 years old, so we had made the trip more times then I could count, but I never paid attention since I wasn’t the one driving.

I wanted to go visit mom and my friends.  Dad was kind enough to allow me to take his car and go see them for a few days. 

Now this was wwaaayyy before cell phones, GPS, Mapquest, or any of the other very helpful tools that we have now for navigation.  I had a map that you would get for free sometimes or purchase at the gas station.

The map was all fine and dandy—provided you could read it. I didn’t bother to get out a marker and study it to make sure I was positive I understood where I was going, nor did dad.  He said, ‘it’s easy, just stay on I-15 and you’ll be fine.


I drove down following the signs and made it to mom’s, visited friends in a near-by town and had a blast.

When it was time to go home I said good-bye to friends, hugged mom with teary eyes and started my drive back. 

A ways down the road I came to signs and chose I-15 as dad had said.

Driving for an hour or so I recognized the area, as it was familiar to me, but knew I was not where I was supposed to be.  It was a another small town I had once lived in, however not the larger city I was meant to be in by now. 

I had to drive for miles in order to find change for a pay phone (ask your mom or grandma if you don’t know what this is) and called dad.  Luckily he was home.  I told him where I was and said I had stayed on I-15 just as he had instructed.  That is when he and I realized I had taken I-15 South instead of I-15 North. 

Why my story you may ask? 

Well, because it is hard to end up at the right destination if we don’t have, or know, a correct course or path our self. 

Stan and I were asked to volunteer at the Women’s state prison facility once a month for a couple of years.

When arriving, first we had to be let into the building by being escorted by those with a special clearance, higher than ours. It was several hundred feet to the security, allowing us into the area where we would be with the women prisoners for the evening.

Often, as we moved from doors to the other side, I would slow my steps to peer through the glass window to my left. I watched the women inmates who had earned the privilege to visit with their family or friends.

My heart would break and my eyes teared, as I saw so frequently saw the grandmother or grandfather with the grandchildren in tow, visiting their daughters, the mothers of the children. 

Visibly the grandparent was burdened in every aspect of life with the situation their posterity was in. It mattered not who had caused what; it was reality to be lived with, each and every single day for the woman, the grandparent and the children. 

I still say a pray for all of those involved, anywhere in the world, who have made poor choices to be in such situations due to their own selfishness, or from lack of correct teaching and training.

How does the women in the prison relate to my drive to see my mom and getting lost?

1- My first mistake was not to take the time, or effort to make sure I understood the map 

Laziness, Distration and Apathy

  • It is SO easy in our day to let electronics, games, tv shows, etc take our time from finding true direction
  • Scriptures and church are a few examples of how we can LEARN direction.
  • Could our choices in life be taking us in a direction that could effect us and our posterity in a negative manner, even resulting in dire circumstances?

2- My second mistake was to not have change for a payphone ready

Are we spiritually, emotionally and physically prepared for the challenges of today?

How can we do this? Do we take the time to study and ponder what do we believe, what do we care about, what are our values and morals?  How do we become a better person?

  • Be Optimistic, hopeful and happy
  • Believe in Yourself – you can do all things if you are doing what God wants you to do
  • We must be flexible because it is vital – life is full of twists and turns
  • Are we putting as much time and effort into the important long lasting aspects of life as the frivolous?  Such as working on making our character to be one valued for high principles and ethics? Striving to be trusted with good judgement and common sense for the long term and not simply selfish whims?

3- My third mistake was to not ask mom before I left for directions, I had another chance for help and didn’t take it!

I have a list of 6 B’s to help us become better prepared to LEARN so we can PRACTICE and BECOME the kind of person others can trust to follow for peace and happiness, as my header guides:

  1. Be Grateful
  2. Be Smart
  3. Be Clean
  4. Be True
  5. Be Humble
  6. Be Prayerful     *For more explanation on each of these click HERE

 These are some of the ways we can have bearing and direction to lead our-self, our family and our posterity in happiness. 

 We may not be in a physical prison as those women were on the other side of the glass. 

We may not be in the middle of a lonely road with only jack rabbits scampering about as company as we try to figure out the road signs. 

  • Yet, are we grounded in the direction in life we want to go that has proven to bring contentment? 
  • Are we willing to sacrifice the petty and quick pleasure for the betterment of our family and for our-self?
  • Do we turn off the video games, tv, and other distractions to read, learn and expand our minds in history, arts and subjects that will help us be grounded in truth?
  • Do we read the scriptures and go to church to learn of God so we can teach our family (take them with us too)?
  • Do we take the time to ponder what God wants us to know?
  • Do we pray sincerely to talk to God about our day and listen to what He wants us to hear?

 Becoming a worthy shadow, a trusted guide, does not happen overnight, nor easily.  It is made up of daily choices.  Sometimes we will fail or feel it is not worth all the effort and sacrifice.  Yet, if we are determined to do  a bit better, keep trying, succeed, back slide, attempt again; going through this process over and over –  through our lifetime.  The victory is in the quest as we never give up or accept defeat.

Copyright Carrie Groneman, A Mother’s Shadow, 2015

Recognize a blessing and be a blessing today


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9 replies
  1. Janine Huldie
    Janine Huldie says:

    I loved the story you shared and boy do I remember when I first learned to drive having no GPS or cell phones back then, too. Great way to convey though about the choices we make and thank you for gentle reminder here today. Hugs, Carrie 😉

  2. Tasha
    Tasha says:

    We all make mistakes in life but we need to be careful when we are willing to roll the dice on a decision that could affect the rest of our life. One of the most common being who we have children by….for some reason it doesn’t seem to matter in the moment that the other parent will always be apart of your life whether good or bad. Lots of conflict come from parents being on two different pages.

    Criminal behavior, as you’ve mentioned, is another bad choice that could have a lasting affect. You can never get that time back and families suffer. It’s ok to take risks in life….but there are positive/negative risks. Gotta learn the difference! Great post Carrie…but I didn’t need to tell you that, did I? lol

  3. Diane Roark
    Diane Roark says:


    All of our choices in life have a lasting impact. We should try hard to follow God and His word. He is our standard in which we should live and base all our decisions on. I love your suggests. Thanks for sharing your great post.

    Diane Roark

  4. Ashley
    Ashley says:

    Great post, Carrie! Very inspirational and thoughtful. I love that you connected your life stories as well. Thank you so much for sharing this great post at the Merry Monday link party. I hope you’ll link up again next week!

  5. J @ A Hot Southern Mess
    J @ A Hot Southern Mess says:

    What a great post! It is too easy in today’s world to be distracted and not realize or understand “the map”. I love this post. Thanks for sharing it and thanks for joining this post up with The Soiree Link Up last week! 🙂

  6. Shirley Wood
    Shirley Wood says:

    Excellent analogy. I’d like to note that if anything bad had happened to you, your parents would have felt the same way the parents and grandparents did at the prison visits. It takes a village to raise a child. I wish we had more villagers in our society today who cared about the future of our children and our world enough to reverse the overpopulation of prisons to an under population story.
    I like this statement of yours “The vic­tory is in the quest as we never give up or accept defeat.”
    We are so glad you shared with us at Merry Monday. I hope to see you at the new party beginning tonight at 9pm EST.


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