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It is not fear that motivates, but awareness and information to drive us forward: that is our goal, to keep us ALL safe and secure.

I have information and tips that will help all ages to be safe, better prepared and more vigilant in thinking of: IF this happens….. WHAT I can do.
Sometimes we feel as if forces around us are out of our control, but with a little knowledge, we are powerful and have the advantage in these situations.
I hope you will pass this on to others, and teach your children so they can protect themselves if they are ever in a circumstance that they need to be self reliant in this area. 

Do You Know Basic Self Defense?
We find our self in several situations every day.
And because many are so routine, we usually do not pay attention or are as aware as we should be of our surroundings and the risks that could be involved.
Here are the most common settings we are routinely would happen to be in. Hopefully we can all be more prepared, more alert and informed after reading this post.


Tips for being safe in your home:

  • Keep your cell phone charged and next to you, even if you have a land line.
  • Keep a light on at night to give the impression someone is awake and to help you see if an intruder comes in.
  • Keep curtains shut so others cannot easily see if you, or your children are alone.
  • Keep bushes and shrubs cut low. This avoids strangers from hiding in them, and makes it easy for neighbors to watch your home when you are there, and when you are away.
  • Keep the outside of your house lit up well so there are not shadows for intruders to easily hid themselves in.
  • Keep your doors and windows shut and locked at night.
  • For sliding doors and windows keep a a dowel in the open slot so it cannot slid open.
  • Protect Yourself From Violent Crime from the National Crime Prevention Council
  • A credible alarm and protection company may be a good fit for you and your family
 What if your home is being broken into. Tips from Readers Digest

Don’t turn on the lights, says Mark Safarik, a retired FBI profiler. That will diminish your night vision. Plus, if you’re near a window, a potential intruder will be able to see you and know instantly where you are. Instead, dial 911 immediately. Then, if you can, find your car’s remote entry device and press the panic button. It’s capable of triggering the alarm from a distance of some 30 to 60 feet, and the loud noise may well frighten the intruder away.


Are you prepared if an intruder breaks in? From Citizen Defense Training. This is an abbreviated portion of their article.
1– Plan now to prevent a tragedy. How will you get out of the house; will you need a rope ladder stored in your room, or can you climb out the window?
2- Once the intruder is inside do you have a safe room? Is there a lock on the inside, a light and supplies for food and necessities?
3- If you do not have a safe room and cannot get out, do you have a way to barricade the door?
4- Can you call 911 or emergency help? Do you keep your cell phone charged, particularly at night?
5- If you must encounter the invader do you know how to handle the situation?
6- Do you know how to prevent if possible the home invasion?


A list of tips for adults on staying safe

  • Don’t walk or jog early in the morning or late at night when the streets are deserted.
  • When out at night, try to have a friend walk with you.
  • Carry only the money you’ll need on a particular day.
  • Don’t display your cash or any other inviting targets such as pagers, cell phones, hand-held electronic games, or expensive jewelry and clothing.
  • If you think someone is following you, switch directions or cross the street. If the person continues to follow you, move quickly toward an open store or restaurant or a lighted house. Don’t be afraid to yell for help.
  • Try to park in well-lighted areas with good visibility and close to walkways, stores, and people.
  • Make sure you have your key out as you approach your door.
  • Always lock your car, even if it’s in your own driveway; never leave your motor running.
  • Do everything you can to keep a stranger from getting into your car or to keep a stranger from forcing you into his or her car.
  • If a dating partner has abused you, do not meet him or her alone. Do not let him or her in your home or car when you are alone.
  • If you are a battered spouse, call the police or sheriff immediately. Assault is a crime, whether committed by a stranger or your spouse or any other family member. If you believe that you and your children are in danger, call a crisis hotline or a health center (the police can also make a referral) and leave immediately.
  • If someone tries to rob you, give up your property—don’t give up your life.
  • If you are robbed or assaulted, report the crime to the police. Try to describe the attacker accurately. Your actions can help prevent someone else from becoming a victim.


Parking Lot Safety

  • Park in well-lit, well traveled areas.
  • Put all of your bags in the trunk.
  • Save most expensive purchases for last.
  • Have your keys ready when you walk out to your vehicle.
  • Always check to make sure no one is hiding in the back seat.
  • Try not to walk out into an empty parking lot. Wait a minute if you have to for someone else to come out of the store.

Parking lot safety tips to reduce your chances of becoming a victim by Consumer Reports

Be choosy where you park

  • Sure, that isn’t always easy. But it could be worth driving around a little to find a spot in a populated area instead of settling on one in a dark, remote location, especially if you are alone. “Park in a well-lit area because criminals hate light; they don’t want to be identified,” said Officer Heidi Miller of the Police Department in Bloomington, Minn., home of the Mall of America.

Lock and stow

  • Many parking-lot thefts occur because drivers neglect to perform the simplest task: locking the car and closing the windows. Don’t allow your car to be an easy target for thieves. Hide valuables such as GPS devices, cell phones, laptops, and ­iPods. If your GPS is mounted to your windshield, pull it off and try to clean off the suction marks so that thieves don’t break into the car looking for it. “Don’t even leave the GPS cable,” Miller said, because criminals think you’re simply putting the device away in your glove box or center console. In addition, if you have an aftermarket stereo with a removable faceplate, Miller suggests removing the face and taking it with you.

Stay focused

  • “People walking through the parking lot don’t pay as much attention as they used to,” Capt. Robert Guidetti of the Paramus, N.J., Police Department said. Instead they are checking e-mail or making calls. Look to your front, side, and rear when walking to and from a store. Being aware of your surroundings lessens your chances of becoming a victim or getting struck by a car, Guidetti says.

Assume you’re watched

  • Criminals watch for shoppers who put purchases in their car or trunk, then walk back into the store. Once you’re gone, it can take only moments to break in and grab items. If you need to stow packages while shopping, repark your car in a different location, away from anyone who could have been observing, says Detective Bob Welsome of the New York City Police Department. Other options are to find out whether the mall has storage lockers available or ask security to hold your packages until you’re ready to leave.

Don’t dally

  • “Walk like you have a purpose,” said Officer Harry Nuskey of the Upper Merion Township, Pa., Police Department, near the popular Mall of Prussia. “Don’t wander, even if you don’t know where your car is.” Have your car key in hand before you leave the store. It can also act as a weapon if necessary, Guidetti says. Once in your car, lock the doors immediately and drive off. Don’t sit and do other things. That will lessen the chance of you becoming a target.

Beware of stranger danger

  • If you are approached or chased, yell or scream to get attention or go back to the store and alert security. If you are followed while driving, go to an open gas station or a populated area with plenty of light, Miller says. “Your best defense is a well-charged cell phone,” Miller said. “Get on the phone and call 911.”


Parking Lot Safety by Road and Travel

  • Don’t approach your vehicle if a van or other large vehicle with tinted windows is parked next to it. Find a security guard to walk you to your car; they are paid to do so. If a security guard isn’t available, look for a nearby couple walking to their car and say something like, “That vehicle wasn’t there when I parked. Would you mind making sure I get into my car safely?” Most people would be happy to lend a moment and ensure your safety.
  • Walk with purpose. Multiple studies have shown that a quick, purposeful walk sends subconscious signals to predators that you are not an easy mark. They typically decide to wait for another victim.
  • Keep one hand free at all times. This at least gives you the opportunity to attempt to fend-off a would-be attacker.
  • Have your key ready to open the car door. Never stand next to your car searching through your purse. Robbers, car-jackers and sexual predators all watch for this type of distraction.
  • Once in your car, lock the doors immediately. This is the time that a bystander could quickly and simply open a car door and let himself in, a frequent tactic since it doesn’t attract a lot of attention from passersby.
  • Get moving. Don’t sit inside of your vehicle adjusting the stereo, rummaging through shopping bags or your purse, or talking on your phone, especially if the lot is not well populated. Instead, drive to a well-lit area and stop the car (but leave it running) and then search for the item, make a phone call, etc.
  • If you have an unlocking button or keyless entry system, make sure you unlock only the driver door. Most keyless systems let you unlock either the driver door or use two punches to unlock all doors. Unlocking all doors allows a predator to simply slide into your car from the passenger side and do whatever he wants.
  • Make sure that your dome light is always functioning properly. As you unlock your vehicle at night, glance into the back seat and make sure that an attacker has not gained access to your car.
  • Lastly, never approach your vehicle if a single male is loitering anywhere near it. Period.


12 Tips To Protect Yourself From Cyberstalking from AboutNews. This is an abbreviated list, click HERE for more detailed information.
1- Never reveal your home address
2- Password protect all accounts
3- Conduct an internet search using your name and phone number
4- Be suspicious of any incoming emails, telephone calls or texts that ask you for your identifying information.
5- Never give out your Social Security Number
6- Utilize stat counters or other free registry counters that will record all incoming traffic to your blogs and web sites
7- Check your credit report status regularly
8- If you are leaving a partner, spouse or boyfriend or girlfriend – especially if they are abusive, troubled, angry or difficult – reset every single password on all of your accounts to something they cannot guess
 9- If you encounter something suspicious – a weird phone call or an emptied account that can’t be explained by your bank – it could be a cyberstalker so act accordingly. 
10- If you think you’re a target, have your PC checked by a professional
11- If you think you have a cyberstalker, move fast.
12- Get lots of emotional support to handle the cyberstalking period and to deal with the aftermath.

If you have been a victim of violent crime please contact Circle The Wagons for help with resources
For help with identifying, coping with, needing resources in any way for child abuse or domestic abuse, click HERE
Through blogging, LaTasha has become a very good friend and a blessing to know. She has a blog of her own called HitBelowTheBeltHard and has a line of self protection products called Safety First Self Defense. We collaborated on Safety Posts and you should check out hers. 
Copyright Carrie Groneman, A Mother’s Shadow, 2015
Recognize a blessing and be a blessing today


  • tasha says:

    Wow! You have really covered all of the bases with this post Carrie! Thank you for teaming up with me and informing women on how to be safe in such an unsafe world. Like you said, it’s not about fear but about being prepared for the unexpected. God bless you Carrie for all of the good you do!

  • What great advice and totally pinned to refer back to. Thank you so much, Carrie and wishing you a great holiday weekend now! 😉

  • Thank you, Carrie. We don’t want to live our lives in fear, but we do want to live our lives safely and happily, and that means staying informed and aware and capable. This is an invaluable, comprehensive list. Thank you for helping us take care of ourselves and our families! 🙂

  • Diane Roark says:

    This is an extremely through list for helping us stay safe. We all have to be prepared just incase we are in a situation we need to know what to do. Sharing so everyone can have an opportunity to learn what they need to do to stay safe.
    Diane Roark

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